Tuesday, March 27, 2012

I’m still that little girl

I’m still that little girl
Last one to be picked up
Time moving at a cruel slow pace
Light turning into darkness
Another day of this.
Waiting on them
To come pick me up.
They forgot.
Something else was much more important.
I walk home
It’s cold.
Cheap shoes don’t do so well on ice
Any minute I’ll slam to the ground
Heart breaking into a million pieces
Disappointment turns to anger
Anger to resentment
Resentment to Hatred
And here I am
Forever trapped in this abyss of darkness
Forever lost
Still forgotten
Somewhere, something shifted
And this bitterness consumes everything good

Thursday, March 22, 2012

Easter mantle

Grabbed some of Drewbie's artwork, made them into a cross, taped them to the wall, set up an angel and there we go!!

The angel is a new piece I inherited from my MIL.

The white bird I did a long time ago. Printed a couple silhouttes of birds, enlarged them on the printer, cut them out and traced them on some wall stickers. Cut them out, stick em on.

Easy peesy.

The Observed Life

So we had company staying with us this week. I find myself planning to make everything comfortable and perfect.

Stressing about the cleanliness and making sure we have a home that says welcome. It’s a work in progress.

It’s curious that these urgent feelings don’t come about when it’s just me and my little clan. Why?

Have we become too familiar with each other?

Are we taking each other for granted?

Why is the observed life so much more fulfilling?

The observed life changes our behavior.

If I’m being observed, or on display, I act different. I do the work. I make it happen and give more.  I accomplish my goals.

If light is observed, it will change it's behavior.

We are all the light.

Friday, March 9, 2012


It's time for 5 Minute Friday with the one, the only... GypsyMama!

Today's Prompt: Empty

It's Friday and the weekend's here! Woohoo!!! I do the best I can to shake off the grit and grime of work and try to rid myself of all that it entails so I can be free and enjoy my time here. I'm so happy I'm not chained to a phone constantly putting out fires. So glad I'm not in management. It's a glorious thing to be able to come home and be here. All of me. Too many times people have defined themselves by what they do.  Friends are co-workers and they can never get out of that circle. Oy! I remember those days. It took almost a whole day to recover from the madness. Thank goodness I've moved on and evolved to bigger and better things... better days. Every once in awhile it tries to capture me.. like the black spiderman. Oh, if every day could be Friday. We build forts and drive in theaters and eat all things bad. We stay up later than usual and laugh at nothing. Good times are here... to stay... We also break out in song at every opportunity..

Thursday, March 8, 2012

What would be your last meal on Earth?

What would be your last meal on Earth?

What an odd question. What WOULD my last meal.. or.. last supper be? Wow. Let me first start out by saying food and I have a love/hate relationship. I mostly HATE food. I hate all the things it does to me. I hate the way it controls me. I hate how I feel about food. I hate how shameful and gluttonous I feel after eating a big meal. It’s awful. My earliest memory of food is being a child and my parents scolding me, sometimes even beating me so I would eat and not be wasteful of food. I never did eat as child. Teenage pictures of me you’d think I was anorexic.
Fast Forward to now and I’m always looking for something to munch on. There’s always something to devour. Even so, I’m not sure I actually have favorite meals or dishes that would answer this question.
I would love my mother in law’s beef stroganoff. I love it because it’s my husband’s favorite and has become our favorite meal when we visit his childhood home. With this meal comes memories and joy I never thought possible.

 My mother in law also introduced me to this delightful dish called Orange Salad. Oh my word, it’s yummy.

I’d like a plate of fresh fruits like pineapples, pears, blueberries, cranberries, grapes, kiwis, coconuts and watermelon. A big turkey leg with gobs and gobs of cranberry sauce.. another funny sweet memory. Empanadas from the Renaissance Festival. Great times. Wedding cake (almond). Chicken Curry made by my aunt. She also makes this Mango fruit compote that’s just heaven.

What would be the setting for the meal?
I am imagining a beach setting. A light happy wind. Hammocks all around. Just a lazy day listening to the waves.
What would you drink with your meal?
Wine. Definitely wine.
Would there be music?
But of course. I have a wide range of music that I hold dear. I love classical music, Enya, Jewel along with Rolling Stones, Aerosmith, Usher and I just cannot live without my Aida soundtrack. We’d have some club music to dance to shake our groove thang.
Who would be your dining companions?
Everyone I love. My family of course. Everyone that’s helped shaped me into the person I am today. My English teach from freshman year in high school. My 5th grade teacher. My best friends. My favorite authors: Cheryl Richardson among others. Idina Menzel. I cannot tell you how much I love this woman. I want to be her so bad. Beth Moore. I cannot wait to meet Beth Moore. I love her so much!
Who would prepare the meal?
My Mother In Law with her Beef Stroganoff and Orange Salad and my aunt with her Chicken curry.