I hate it when he drinks
I can always tell:
The shuffle swayed
The voice slurs
The nonsensical words
When he drinks
Something deep inside erupts:
Rage
Anger
Bitterness
Cold
FEAR
He reminds me of her:
Her vanity controlling her
Her disregard for everything
Her walking into walls
It's like she never really died
She lives here all around me
I can never be free of her.
Again, I have to fend for myself
Again, enormous burdens await me
Again, I need to make excuses
Again, I need to do battle, myself.
Face untold enemies
Exhibit strength I do not have
Grow up too quickly
I never thought I'd be here again.
I never thought I'd feel so alone.
